submitted by Bench
SEPTEMBER 8-10, 2014
Under new management, the surging Astros have taken four of five from the A’s and Angels and now head to the MLB hinterlands of the Pacific Northwest to continue playing the role of AL West SPOILER. The Mariners sit nine games out of first place in the American League West, but are in position to take one of the two Wild Card spots, which would be their first postseason berth since 2001. Currently the bunting tossers are tied with the free falling A’s, half a game up on the Tigers with the Yanks and Indians sitting within five games. TO THE BILGE WITH THEM!
The current September version of the Astros seems light years away from last year’s September version, who swooned to a 15 game season ending losing streak. However, last year the Astros managed to go 7-5 before ending with the 15 game crapper, so we’ll get a useless metric of illusory progress based upon how the last half of the month goes.
Meanwhile, Altuve continues his quest to cap one of the all-time great Astro offensive seasons by eclipsing Biggio’s club hit record of 210 hits. Altuve leads the Major Leagues in batting average (.340), hits (198) and is first in the American League with 51 stolen bases. Carter continues his quest for 40 homeruns and an enormous arbitration award. The starting rotation continues to come together, and Qualls won’t be facing the A’s anymore. This is actually kind of fun.
Monday Sep. 8, 2014
Safeco Field – 9:10 CT
Brad Peacock (4-8 5.01 ERA)
Great name, mediocre pitcher. It’s like the opposite if Felix Hernandez were named Gerald Feltcher. But Brad has been pitching well over his last few starts, going 1-0 with 2.16 ERA in 16.2 innings. Over his career, Peacock is 2-3 against the Crusty Seamen with a 6.98 ERA. Ackley and Morales have hit him particularly hard.
Felix Hernandez (14-5 2.18 ERA 37 BB 209 K)
He’s the fucking king.
Tuesday Sep. 9, 2014
Safeco Field – 9:10 CT
Collin McForkingHuge 8-9 2.89 ERA)
McHugh has continued to be McForkingHuge, going 4-0 with a 1.79 ERA in his last seven starts. Despite tossing that initial gem in Seattle when he was first called up, he’s been knocked around for a couple of losses in his last two bouts against the grog snarfing blaggards. Time for some revenge.
Roenis Elias (10-12 3.90ERA)
Roenis makes the most of the vowels in his name. And he’s made the most of his work against the Astros, allowing only 3 hits in 19 at bats against the good guys. However, he hasn’t been able to pitch deep into games regularly which gives a chance to get into the downy seagull underbelly of the Mariners’ no doubt well rested bullpen.
Wednesday Sep. 10, 2014
Safeco Field – 9:10 CT
Nick Tropeano (naught)
And here is our September callup major league debut. The 24 year old went 9-5 with a 3.03 ERA in 23 games (20 starts) at Triple-A Oklahoma City this season with 120 strikeouts and a .202 batting average against in 124 2/3 innings.
Hishashi Iwakuma (14-6 2.97 ERA)
Iwakuma has been the 1-B to King Felix’s 1-A for the Cropswaggles this season. He’s scuffled as of late, dropping 2 of his last 3 games with a 7.24 ERA over 13.2 innings pitched therein. But historically he’s done well against the Astros – no great feat of course – with a career 4-2 record with a 2.56 ERA against the good guys. Altuve hits him too, as has Dominguez.
Lawless seems to have the team on an even, relaxed keel. By all media accounts he seems to be a charming person. He also doesn’t give a fuck about your idea of pitching matchups which seems as anti-advanced data metrics as you can get:
Lawless, who spent a lot of time on the bench as a player watching former Cardinals manager Whitey Herzog, said he’s not big on matchups, such as left-handed pitchers have to face left-handed batters.
“If you can’t go out there and pitch an inning and get three outs, then maybe you’re not a Major League pitcher,” he said. “That’s why games are five hours long, because we drag them. Get three outs and play on.”
Hear hear. But really, is that the comment of someone in lock step with the organizational philosophy espoused by Luhnow and his collection of affectionately likeable nerds? Regardless, the team is playing well, having fun, getting some good experience for young up and comers and whippersnappers, and fucking over their rivals’ post-season chances in the process. So far, it’s been about as perfect a September as a team that is no longer abjectly awful can hope for.
The burgoo gibees take two of three.